The Subtle UnRaveling

I’ve been ailed lately by a very overpowering case of writer’s block. There’s been so much of my life to tell recently, but I can’t encapsulate it in a coherent piece of writing it seems. The daily Drive at Five has been grating on my soul and inner peace: the jockeying from lane to lane to decrease the commute time by .05 seconds in the end, memorizing the license plate number, make, model, year, and bumper stickers associated with the car in front of me for an entire 30 minutes, the exhaust fumes, the heat waves rising from the black sizzling asphalt, and an entire radiostream entity of idiot DJs who bring no joy whatsoever at the end of my workday. My workday that consists of office space shared with menopausal and melancholic women. My cubicle fails to protect me against overheard conversations involving one certain co-worker’s numerous and desperate attempts at romance as she relives every single conversation she has had with these men to five of her closest comrades fighting the same battle. I think she should hire a therapist and salvage her cell phone bill.

So my thread-bare soul that crawls into my overheated car every evening (that could easily qualify for a Bikram Yoga experience), is in need of a severe change of pace. But not tonight. At five I’m driving one block over to Barnes and Noble and propping my tired heels up on a striped, overstuffed chair with a mountain of magazines. Threadbare souls are a danger to themselves and others and need immediate attention to be given to what is unraveling their soul’s tapestry.

At the end of the day you should judge how much you let yourself become unraveled by two pivotal questions: Did I bring joy? Did I find joy?

Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle. The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours.
Ayn Rand

Don't ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive. And then go and do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.
Harold Whitman